All-In on the Turn

Professional Soapbox Yeller

2009-02-26T20:12:00.000-08:00

Scenario: Team A and Team B have exactly the same type of players.

Team A's Philosophy
Practice when you need it. Listen to the coach when you agree. Play the position you like the best. Play as many minutes as you feel like.

Team B's Philosophy:
Practice is mandatory. Run the offense/defense. Play the position and minutes that most benefit the team.

Which team is more likely to be successful?
Which team is more likely to have less problems with blaming and finger-pointing?

Scenario: Player A and Player B have exactly the same type of skills.

Player A's Philosophy:
I'm the best player on the team. I don't need to practice. Wearing a tie for game day is just for show and not going to score me any points. I don't need to follow coach's directions. I'm a better player when I'm allowed to be creative and make up my own plays.

Player B's Philosophy:
I'm the best player on the team, therefore, I must practice just like everyone else. I hate ties, but coach asks that everyone wear one, so I will. I could probably score more points if I shot every basket, but the triangle offense only works if everyone does it.

Which attitude is more beneficial to the culture of the team?
Which player's actions contribute more positively to the attitudes and actions of his teammates?

Final Thought...
One college coach started his first practices with the same lesson every season. The lesson? How to put on your socks and tie your shoes.

The coach?

John Wooden, winner of 10 NCAA Men's Basketball Championships.

Did they win those championships because of their footwear? Probably not. But his culture of discipline, simplicity of purpose, and attention to detail embodied by that lesson might have had something to do with it.

FREEEEEEEDOOMMMMMMMMMM!!!

2008-11-07T21:01:00.000-08:00

"The truth shall set you free."

Here's a thought. Take truth and freedom one step further. Once set free by truth, what are we truly set free to do? Armed with truth, do we act with impunity or does truth actually serve not to free, but to limit? When Adam and Eve at the apple, they received a greater understanding of truth. The consequence of this was not freedom, but the shackles of sin, guilt, and death.

Of course, truth doesn't always have such dire consequences. My main point is that awakening to truth actually LIMITS your choices rather than expanding them. I would argue that recognizing truth creates a moral responsibility and obligation to act in accordance with those beliefs. Therefore, if you hold as truths that we have an enormous impact on our students, that the demands of the world are increasingly dynamic and complex, and that we are responsible for the success of every student, then the truth does not set us free. It does the exact opposite. It awakens us to the awesome burden we have as educators and reveals the faith that students and their parents place in us when they walk through our doors.

Now, you could believe the exact opposite is true. That we're just a small part of our student's lives, that the world is the same as it ever was and our students will figure out a way to succeed, and that whether or not our students succeed has little to do with the instruction we provide in the scant few years we see them. That's certainly your prerogative. My only question is, what kind of teacher would you want for your own children and are you acting in accordance to your own beliefs?

The Blame Game

2008-11-06T18:20:00.000-08:00

First off, I want to say that I am thoroughly enjoying this dialogue, and I only wish we had more conversations like this among the staff.

Now, on with the show...

G, you asked who are these mystery teachers? Gimme a roster and a highlighter. No judging. I'd go simply go on what I've seen first hand. I do about three to four observations a month (30-45 min each) and I've seen almost every teacher (but primarily those on Teams 1-3 and A-C). I purposely avoid those in our blogosphere because students do pretty good in your classes, and also because I kinda know what I'm gonna get when I observe students there. Granted, a single 30 minute observation is a pretty small sampling, but over the course of four years I've done well over a hundred. That, combined with the meetings I attend and the conversations I have with our counselors, provide me with some idea of the general instruction that occurs on our campus. Again, my information is not perfect. I'm simply saying that worksheets, 'I lecture you take notes', 'read the chapter and answer the questions', and other similar A Quadrant activities continue to make up the majority of instruction I see and hear about.

There also seems to be a lot of foam finger waving at certain members of our team. More specifically, those responsible for kickoffs, punts, and field goals. This is not a new or uncommon sentiment. However, I'd like to explore why I believe that sentiment is unfair and based on flawed logic.

The results many are using to judge the SpEd teachers are the HSA scores. This is in inaccurate and irresponsible use of data. In fact, the way we use HSA scores for EVERYONE is inaccurate and irresponsible. The HSA is ONE form of data at ONE point in time. It evaluates not just reading, writing, and math, but task committment and previous education. Studies continue to show that the biggest correlations for high test scores is not the teacher, school, or race, but INCOME LEVEL and PARENT EDUCATION LEVEL. Look at the areas that do well, Mililani, Manoa, Nuuanu, Moanalua, Hawaii Kai, and Pearl City, then look at the areas that don't, Waianae, Nanakuli, Waimanalo, Kalihi, and Waipahu. I'm not saying all our SpEd families are impoverished and poorly educated (although my informal observations find this disturbingly common). What I am saying is that the HSA test is not the be-all, end-all evaluator of student or teacher performance, and that performance on the HSA shouldn't equal a corresponding evaluation of any teacher.

Of course Joe Public (no relation to Joe the Plumber) doesn't see this. They just see the test score in the paper. Parent satisfaction is important, but it cannot come at the cost of our pedagogical principles. Besides, do you think that one score would completely undermine the relationship and high-quality work you develop throughout the entire year? Also, how would any of the intiatives (examining student work, Standards Wall, rigor/relevance, etc.) LOWER test scores anyway?

Another thing to think about. SpEd students are SpEd for a reason. Regular students with top-notch teachers have a hard time on that test. For some SpEd students, that test is just plain impossible. Many simply don't have the cognitive, emotional, and behavioral qualities to perform well in the manner the HSA requires. How would you feel if you coached a team of 5'5", one-eyed, can only dribble with one hand players in an open league, and people blamed you everytime they lost? Now think about your players. What do you think is running through their heads?

I'm not saying our SpEd teachers are blameless. I'm simply saying it's flawed logic to put the all the blame on them or call them incompetent because their students don't pass HSA. Yeah, some of them are don't know the difference between mitosis and a microscope. Yeah, some of them are lazy. But are we saying that these same issues don't plague the gen. ed. teachers as well? If HSA is THE critera, aren't all of us incompetent since none of us have had all our students pass that test? In fact, about one-third of our students can't pass the reading, and only a little more than half can pass the math (I could be wrong on these numbers, but I think I'm close enough to make the point). Does anyone really have the right to start pointing fingers?

Twice In One Night? Viagra's the BOMB!

2008-11-04T23:58:00.000-08:00

There were two types of responses I thought Jay's and Greg's posts required. One philosopical (the previous) and one practical (this one).

"We're never told why we're doing anything except for we have to."

I think that's a little unfair. I think you can say, "Leadership really sucks at explaining things," or "You guys use crappy examples," or simply, "You've never convinced me," but I don't think what you said is a true statement.

Take the Standards Wall for example. You accurately state that it was something we did years ago and went away from. However, I distinctly remember Ursula and Cy conducting both whole school and department workshops to help teachers understand how to use it and why it can help students. Focus walks and in-class support was provided to help teachers. Similar training was done at the beginning of this year, and Ellen tried to provide an additional explanation on Monday. You obviously don't agree with the rationale, but it's inaccurate to say one was never presented. In fact, you actually call the reasons 'textbook bull$hit.'

If you look at Student Work Review, Formative Assessment (which you helped on), the Vison and Mission, co-teaching, and teaming, time was devoted to explaining the rationale for each of those initiatives. Now, they may have not all been effective, connected into a single cohesive message, and follow-up has been a HUGE issue, but not ONCE in any of those instances was the staff ordered to simply 'Just Do It' in the manner you state.

I also think it's unfair to say, "Let's be honest here," and then dictate what that 'honesty' means. Is it impossible to think that the Standards Wall could actually help students? That it could help teachers collaborate? I accept that teachers can perceive the Wall in the manner you state, but doing so doesn't make the other reasons untrue or false. By calling the presented rationale for the Wall 'textbook bull$hit' don't you reveal an automatic and unfair disregard for ANY possible rationale that could be presented other than your own? Why does lesson review and the Wall have to be about judging? Why can't we just collaborate and offer suggestions in the manner you suggested in your blog?

I addressed the "We're changing too much" issue in my previous blog. But to add to that, what exactly has changed too much at our school? I would contend that you've changed far more as a result of the collaboration you've had with Deena than through anything the school has demanded. Also, if you look at our school day, how much of our actual teaching experience is that much different than three, five, eight years ago? Did the old Vision and Mission impact your instruction that much? Is writing the standard on the board illogical and time consuming? Did the Student Work Review (which occurs during school time) negatively impact the collaboration that existed prior to it? With the exception of the Standards Wall (which does take some time and effort) what exactly is making you work harder in a way that seems illogical?

In theory, these things are great. I think it's unfair to say that the effectiveness of practices like the Standards Wall, regular teacher collaboration on student work, inclusion of SpEd students with the general education population, providing effective feedback, and using formative assessment are theoretical. They're not guaranteed, like practice is not guaranteed to equal success, but there is a lot of strong evidence to indicate that they do work.

But until we pull back on the reins and let teachers figure out for themselves that it's effective, no one will do it for the right reasons. How 'bout we just tell people the truth and just let them figure it out for themselves. No force. No manipulation. Just plain good ol' honesty. THE TRUTH.

What would this look like? What would we tell people and what would they need to figure out? This sounds logical, but I don't understand the specifics. Are you saying we shouldn't do anything except teach and attend parent meetings? No faculty, no waiver days, no dept. or team meetings? That a few years of independent work time would lead to our students learning more? And are there 'right' reasons we would connect with now or are they only available after we figure it out for ourselves?

Lastly, the hostility and frustration implicit within the beliefs that LT is manipulative and just coming up w/ $hit to look good, seem busy, or just do the next new shiny thing, creates a lot of dissappointment for me. If the general perception is that we have nothing better to do than think of meaningless busy work for the staff to do, then we have truly failed the staff and our students. I really mean this, and I am not being self-pitying in any way. Maybe the people who are there have been doing this for too long. Maybe we're not the right people and never were. If the feeling of the staff is that LT and the school improvements we're trying to make are counter-productive, then we've definitely failed at identifying, communicating, and monitoring what we need to do, how we need to do it, and whether we need to do anything at all.

So where do I go from here? What should I do now, peeps?

The Audacity of Hope and the Necessity of Despair

2008-11-04T22:16:00.001-08:00

Would Obama have won if the economy hadn't imploded in the last month?

Would Obama have won if McCain didn't pick Palin?

Would Obama have won if Dubya wasn't, well...Dubya?

Obama wasn't elected JUST BECAUSE HE'S A GOOD CANDIDATE. People voted for him because they were fed up with the last eight years and didn't want to see more of the same in the future. His message of change would not be nearly as powerful or relevant if the majority of the public thought everything was ok, OR if he was unable to convince the public that they were not as ok as they thought.

This is the conversation I was trying to have at Leadership on Monday. When I spoke about school culture, my feeling was that:

1) The staff may not believe change is necessary.
2) As a result, the staff may feel school improvment efforts are pointless.

I felt Leadership could discuss a way to involve the ENTIRE STAFF in a process to really examine ourselves and figure out:

1) Are we as good as we think?
2) Is that good enough?
3) Are we willing to be better?

When I brought up school culture, I wasn't talking about doing stuff. I was asking about the attitudes that permeate our school. If the culture of our school is that, "Everything is ok, just leave me alone," then any effort at meaningful school improvement is doomed to fail, isn't it?

And I disagree with Greg that we've reinvented ourselves more times than Madonna. If you examine the attitudes and the teaching practices of our teachers as a whole, are we really that different than we were three, five, eight years ago? I would argue that very little has changed as the direct result of any deliberate effort by the school. To me we're more like your flavor of the month boy-band. New Kids on the Block, Menudo, Backstreet Boys, NSync...we change the singers, dance moves, and outfits, but the act is still the same. Jay is right. We do things for a little bit, then change, change again, then change back to what we were doing in the first place. We're like that girl who can never find 'Mr. Right.' The problem is it's not because of who we're dating, it's because of who we are.

The intense frustration and anger I sense from both Jay and Greg seems to be, "I didn't ask for anyone's help. You haven't convinced me that I need it or that you've got something better. Until you do, leave me the f@ck alone." The point I was attempting to make on Monday was that we're never going to get anywhere until we address that central belief system.

But how would you do that and is it even possible? Hummer owners probably didn't care much about global warming until gas went over four-dollars. I'm pretty sure an anti-smoking campaign didn't exist until we discovered that cigarettes caused cancer. And would we have the same attitude about bullying if Columbine (and other similar events) never happened?

What information or experience must the staff have in order to consider change? And is it even possible to provide them?

I've Done a Test...Mine Does Smell Better

2008-11-03T19:10:00.000-08:00

A lady opens three bags of tampons to find the right size at Walmart. Where's security?

A guy pisses in the parking lot. No security here either?

A mother steals two cans of formula at Longs. No one does anything. Nope. No security here either.

Big shot Wall Street hedge-fund manager loses millions for retirees. He gets a fat severance check. What? Didn't you know money can buy innocence?

Huge election tomorrow. More than 30% of the population won't vote. Hey, it's all a big conspiracy anyway...

How long do you have to drive before you see somone speed, run a red light, cut someone off, make an illegal turn, etc.? Obviously, law enforcement is incompetent.

Jay was right. We live in a guiltless society. We no longer police ourselves because we're convinced that's not our jobs anymore. Making sure others do the right thing? That's for priests, police officers, and principals. If they can't? Oh, well...

I'm sorry. I cannot handle that.

I don't want Allison thinking she only has to do what's right when someone with power is looking.

I don't want Allison believing she can make up her own morality or that her actions only affect herself.

I refuse to accept that WE (as individuals and as a profession) can refuse the obligation to make ourselves better and hold ourselves accountable for our actions.

I care a lot about what you guys all think because I believe in your professionalism and personal value systems. When Jay says, "Blake, you just don't have the right to tell anyone what to do. You haven't taught long enough. You don't know enough. Your biceps aren't big enough." I accept that. I don't want to be perceived as a judgmental ass. I just get stuck when the next sentence is, "Boss gotta do it." Then what? Does anyone who wants change need to go into admin or pump iron?

Of course we wouldn't have this problem if change was easy, but people don't change because you ask them. People change because they become so uncomfortable with who they are that it overcomes their fear or laziness against change. I've changed a lot as a result of my professional and personal relationships. People have said or done things that have made me angry, hurt, disappointed, happy, sometimes proud, often humble. I've often disagreed, but what I never thought was, "Pfft...You don't have the right to tell me that," because if I can't listen to my peers, who can I listen to? What other profession demands less from their peers? Could a lawyer or doctor continue to be successful without the competition and collaboration of his colleagues? What other profession so fully embraces such an antipathy toward criticism?

Basically, I agree that no one has a monopoly on the truth. SOME things about teaching are subjective. You can't be an dickhead and ram anything up or down anywhere without consequence.

BUT...I will ALWAYS believe that we have a personal and professional responsibility to improve ourselves and our colleagues, and that we will never become the school our students need us to be if we are unwilling to accept that burden.

Fo'Shizzle...Word...ONE...Peace...

Sweet Little Lies...

2008-11-02T13:29:00.000-08:00

This has got to be the one-billionth time we've had variations of the knowledge vs. caring issue, but here goes...

Jay said what I meant better than I said it when he said people don't care, BUT don't like feeling bad, so their brains make up crap so that they don't have to.

Where I divert from Jay and Alex is that they always know the difference between the truth and the lies they tell themselves. I think if you live with lies long enough, you start believing the lies. That was the point I was so poorly trying to make with Alex. I have a difficult time believing that most people would KNOWINGLY do bad things if they understood the impact of their actions. Wouldn't such a person be morally bankrupt? Personally, I think I'd much rather be perceived as ignorant or deluded rather than a dickhead.

So I prefer (for the sake of my own sanity) to believe that these people simply don't see or understand the truth in a way that will break through their ignorance or the lies they tell themselves. This is why I love House. He never asks people to act counter to their morality. He simply confronts them with the TRUTH. Your religion says no medicine? Fine, but you're gonna DIE.

But since we don't live in TV Land where the brilliant doctor is always right, who determines what's true? What gives any person the right to determine truth? Guilt can't function in a vacuum, yet anyone who points out the 'truth' to someone else risks being called judgmental or arrogant. If everyone's $hit stinks, who has the right to stand up and say, "Ok, who's not wiping their @$$?"

Right vs. Cheap

2008-10-02T12:45:00.000-07:00

So here was my moral dilemma...

234 disposable environmentally irresponsible diapers for $35.99 = about 15 cents ea.

or

280 eco-friendly cloth diapers for $108 ($88 for 70 per week + $5 a week trans. charge) = about 38 cents ea.

And this doesn't include the diaper covers ($10-12 ea.). So in all, it would probably cost about $670 more to use cloth vs. disposables for the next year.

Unfortunately, that is past my moral tipping point. I'll have to find other ways to save the environment...

What we may end up doing is using disposables until Allison gets bigger. The larger diaper sizes are more expensive anyway and it will help get Allie ready for potty training.

Something Negative

2008-10-01T12:12:00.001-07:00

Where can I buy Paxil in bulk? I want whatever the Boss is on...

After our Leadership Meeting she catches me in my office and tries to explain to me that everything is going fine. After ten minutes of circular conversation, I asked her two very simple questions.

What percentage of teachers would reply YES to:
a) "Am I an excellent?"
b) "Do we possess and promote a culture of excellence at our school?"
Her answer to A was over 90%.
Her answer to B was 80%.

How can you solve a problem that apparently doesn't exist?

Something Positive

2008-09-17T02:21:00.000-07:00

We have more drama from team Poopoo'kela.

Lunch made me wish I brought a pool and some jello.

I have no answers for how a team can help a possible paranoid schizophrenic.

The stock market SUCKS B@LLS (today's rebound is an anomaly)

Joni's last day was today.

Boo to all that crap. I'd like to share something positive.

I was and continue to be completely suprised by how generous and thoughtful everyone has been with Allison. Thank you to each and every one of you who has made or given me something in the last few weeks. I really am touched by how much thought you put into your gifts (because I have aboslutely NO craft skills or patience for such) and I truly appreciate EVERY SINGLE DOLLAR on those gift cards. You know how money conscious I am. When I saw how many people contributed, I was both humbled and ashamed to be the recipient of such generosity.

Looking back when some of you had your children, I know I was not nearly as thoughtful, and I regret my ignorance of how profound this experience is, and how much that experience is enriched by the love and friendship of those who care about you.

I know some crappy things are going on in the school, but please take a little happiness from the knowledge that your actions have truly meant a lot to me and Stacie.

Do Diapers Grow on Trees?

2008-09-14T12:27:00.000-07:00

Amy and Dave this post is for you.

I'm sure glad people gave us their spare diapers because these things are going faster than leftover snacks in the Library.

The first time you use more than two diapers in a single change it's funny. The second time, less funny. The third, fourth and fifth? You start thinking, "Hmm...Diaper rash cream is cheaper than diapers so..."

Another funny tidbit...Baby wipes. Just buy the big Costco / Sam's Club 700 sheet pack. In fact, buy two. Stupid at math me was thinking, "Wow, this bag of 190 is going to last us forever! We'll never use that box!" DOH! One to two sheets per change X 9-12 changes a day. The bag is almost empty and we're only on day six.

You Can't Handle the Truth!!!

2008-09-11T14:32:00.000-07:00

Do you think everyone is as dissatisfied as us or are most people pretty cool with the way things are going?

Do you think a significant amount of the staff has deep-seated gripes and concerns that bug the crap out of them but suffer in silence because they’re too polite or nice to do anything about it?

Do you think people are so frustrated with how others conduct themselves that this frustration has become an obstacle to our progress as a school?

I ask these questions because I’m beginning to wonder if our school needs a good dose of HONESTY.

I don’t mean touchy-feely kumbayah crap or screaming in your face ‘You’re an IDIOT’ accusations. I’m talking about developing a process that teams, departments, committees, and individuals can use to sit down and really confront the behaviors that have become obstacles to progress.

I read the blogs and listen to people at lunch and in my office. I completely empathize with everyone and have many of my own concerns. However, wouldn’t the situation be better served if those thoughts were shared with the people you’re upset with? Of course, that’s not to say that people haven’t tried. We ALL know people have tried to communicate their dissatisfaction in various ways. What I’m wondering is if we need to recognize this and address this as a SCHOOL.

Do we need to create formal opportunities to make unprofessional people feel so uncomfortable, hurt, and ostracized that they consider change? Can we create situations for real honesty? And would the honesty of their peers convince enough people to change the culture of the school?

Of course, maybe we’re all overreacting. Maybe we all need to relax and just accept the fact that teachers are representative of the general population and let’s face it…the general population is exactly full of geniuses and go-getter.

It's the End of the World As We Know It...

2008-09-06T22:40:00.000-07:00

ACT I

So, at about 9 at night, I'm at Mililani Walmart standing in awe of the Great Wall of Maxipads. Not being a maxipad expert, I've been searching the Wall for about five mintues trying to find plain cotton pads so Stacie can cover her stitches. There's wings, super, long, thin, regular, scented, wide, channeled, heavy, maxi, etc...

While I'm reading about the benefits of lavender scented feminine protection, up walks this twentyish female with a 3-5 year old child in her arms. After staring at the Wall for a second, she decides to open bag after bag of pads looking for the style she wants. She opens about four bags before she succeeds and leaves down another aisle.

After I get over my shock, I shrug my shoulders and call Stacie, asking her what kind of pads would just have plain cotton. I explain it's kind of hard to tell what material each pad is made of just from the picture and then at conversational volume say, "I mean, I could just open the bags until I found the right ones but that would be a little low class wouldn't it?"

Can you GUESS who was behind me when I said that?

But, hey...What's a little stink eye right?

Act II

So I do a little more shopping and then walk out to my car. As I walk through the parking lot, I notice that there's this pretty huge local-looking guy standing with his hands on his hips facing my car and me.

I quickly glance back, and who should be about 50 feet behind me? Ms. Low Class herself.

Was I really gonna get my ass kicked in the Walmart parking lot? Are you freaking serious?

It wasn't until I was about ten feet from my car that I heard that distinctive 'sssssssss' sound and the jiggle of a belt buckle (a shopping cart hid him from waist down).

Mr. Heinekin throws me a big grin and says, "No worry, brah. I never piss on your car."

"Uh...thanks?"

I look back and Ms. Low Class is gone.

Two totally unrelated incidents that continue to confirm my increasing disappointment in the human race.

Random Thoughts...

2008-09-05T14:41:00.000-07:00

It's very hard not to hyper-analyze every little thing with your first baby, but whenever I do, for some reason I think of Alex rolling his eyes.

They say classical music is supposed to be good for babies, but I have yet to hear a classical CD and say, "Wow, let's listen to that again!" Current discs in changer are: Tragic Kingdom-No Doubt, Jim Croce's Greatest Hits, Surfacing-Sarah McLachlan, Shine the Soundtrack, Walking Down Rainhill-Jake Shimabukuro.

Invaluable books - What to Expect-The First Year and Happiest Baby on the Block

Apart from money, FOOD is the best gift ever for parents of a newborn. We haven't cooked for a week and that's been AWESOME.

People keep asking me if I feel different? No, but I look differently at Allison than I do at other babies.

And no...I didn't cry.

Mr. Sensitive

2008-09-01T22:03:00.000-07:00

Let me get the important stuff out of the way:

Both mom and Allison are healthy and doing great. I'll probably stop by tomorrow for a couple of hours to clear the messages off my phone and stuff so I'll try and bring some pics.

As for me, the last few days have taught me quite a bit.

1) The fact that we've survived as a race completely amazes me after witnessing the amount of physical trauma involved in childbirth.

2) Modern medicine is freaking amazing. The baby was out less than 30 minutes after Stacie went into the operating room. As I write, Stacie is walking around like nothing happened. All she's taking for pain is 600 mg of ibuprofen.

3) Everything seems like a victory. Ten fingers and ten toes? Whohoo!!! 1st Poop? High five! Finally latching after 20 minutes of trying? Give her a medal.

4) I feel REALLY crappy about not being more supportive / celebratory when everyone else had their babies and other kid-related major events. I simply did not understand the 'holy-shit' magnitude of the entire experience until now. Of course, I'll probably still play with your dogs before I play with your kids, but at least now it's from lack of knowledge, not lack of interest.

That's enough for now. I'll keep you all updated.

Anti-Climaxic

2008-08-25T20:11:00.001-07:00

Today was a lesson in judging and making assumptions.

Turns out the whole 'consipiracy' was nothing of the sort and that everything was on the up and up. A student attending summer school needed support. Actually, I had known about the assignment (but not the individual assigned) and just completely forgot about it.

So, all in all. Things turned out about as good as it could have.

I have to admit though, a lot of scary thoughts were going through my mind as I walked into that office.

As the School Turns...

2008-08-21T20:52:00.001-07:00

What is this about 'abusing sick leave'? I'm curious.

I was recently in a meeting where the teacher told the parent, "But I repeat myself like a MILLION times! What more do you want me to do?"

I was given an email where a teacher wrote to a parent saying, "If your son gets an F or a low D for the first quarter, he may not be able to dig himself out of the hole he made and pass for the semester."

Not ten mintues after Boss tells me, "Don't say ANYTHING about ___________ until I can finalize it in a week or so." A counselor walks into my office and says, "Blake, Boss just told my entire department that __________ is happening."

Was I the LAST one to find out Joni's leaving Highlands to take a position in Central District?

I just found out that a student spent ALL LAST YEAR not wiping after defecating in school. How does that happen? Seriously? HOW?

Oh, and as a final suggestion...When in a parent or IEP meeting, it's usually NOT good practice to cross your arms, lean waaaay back in your chair, and talk down your nose to a parent advocate. Good thing the advocate likes the staff at Highlands.

You're Stupid! No, You're Stupid! No, YOU'RE STUPID!

2008-08-14T19:37:00.001-07:00

Wow, I’m gone for a few days and $hit just breaks loose!

Seriously, I agree w/ pretty much everything everyone said.

1)There are a lot of completely clueless, lazy, hypocritical people at our school
2)Working with them is an exercise in patience and tolerance

The funny thing is, I guarantee that if they wrote blogs, they’d be saying the same thing about us.

Which allows me to segue into “Gone Baby Gone.” Jay was surprised that I picked Morgan Freeman’s side. Based on our previous ‘doing the right thing’ conversations, I can understand why he thought I would go the other way, but I’ve pretty much come to believe that PEOPLE DON’T CHANGE.

Was that crack-whore mother going to change just because she got her daughter back? NO.

Are some people ever going to change their ‘I only want to teach the kids who want to learn my way’ attitude just because some people advocate for them in a logical and altruistic manner? NO.

People don’t change unless they have to. PERIOD. End of story.

The only way to make people change is to increase their physical, psychological, or emotional discomfort until change becomes more appealing than remaining the same.

So how do you accomplish this in any school, let alone ours?

Beats the crap out of me…Tom’s the one who runs the school…

Just kidding.

I’ll continue this post later. I’m tired.

Gone Baby Gone

2008-08-13T00:37:00.000-07:00

Art in any form must do more than entertain or shock. Art should challenge the soul to remake itself into something more complex and profound.

This movie probably didn't make as much money as it should've. It's full of too many of those uncomfortable moments that mess with your moral compass. That being said, I loved it. It was right in line with "No Country For Old Men" and the new Batman.

I'm not going to talk about the movie except to say go rent it. In about a month I'll throw out a longer post about "No Country..." and "Gone Baby Gone", but I don't want to ruin it for people who still haven't gotten around to it.

Straight to Detention

2008-08-10T10:41:00.000-07:00

Ok, my daughter's not even out of the womb and she's already disobedient.

Turns out our baby likes things right side up and is REFUSING to flip over. So on Wedndesday, we're going in to try aversion. This is where they try and flip the baby from the oustide. When they do this, three things can happen:

1) Baby turns, deliver as planned...somewhere around the 5th of September.
2) Baby goes passive aggressive and refuses to move. We plan for a Cesearean instead.
3) Baby throws a tantrum, vitals spike, and doctors decide to deliver by Cesearean right then and there.

So...I could be a daddy in three days depending on how compliant my daughter is.

What a thought...

Can I Get a Whut Whut...

2008-08-07T23:34:00.000-07:00

Note: I apologize in advance to any Heinekin-drinking, MMA-watching titas in the audience. The following is an effort at humor. Please do not call your braddahs and couzins to come mob me.

You know what I love about my job?

Parents find such interesting ways to communicate their displeasure with the DOE.

This morning, a MOTHER threatened to ‘roll up on me’ and ‘get all up in my grill.’ At first I wasn’t worried because I don’t have a hibachi, but her repeated use of those phrases combined with other negative comments indicated that she wasn’t interested in a barbecue.

After an additional half-hour of accusations and complaints, she closed our conversation by stating that if things were not addressed to her satisfaction, she might just have to ‘bust out all Ewa Beach and go tita on me.’ I assume that’s not an invitation to drink Heinekins and watch MMA pay-per-views.

I will say this about her. She loves her kids, and they couldn’t have a more passionate advocate. What she obviously fails to understand (other than basic English), however, is that she will NEVER get what she wants talking to people like that.

I mean REALLY…How can you use ‘roll-up’ and ‘get up in my grill’ in a sentence not concerning fruit snacks or picnics without completely losing your credibility? And ‘go tita’ on me? Where exactly was she on the tita meter during our conversation? How much more tita did she have left before she crossed over into moke action?

“Language shapes thought.”
George Orwell

Here’s something to think about. If this parent had access to a wider range of language, would her thoughts (based on her ability to more accurately and fully express them) develop into deeper understanding?

Or put more simply...If she couldn’t talk like a tita, would she continue to act like one?

Lucky Number Thirteen

2008-08-02T00:12:00.000-07:00

To celebrate our 3 year wedding anniversary, I’m going to share thirteen (because I married you in my heart when we met thirteen years ago <-pat your panties ladies!!!) things I love about my wonderful wife. They are not in any particular order.

1. Cute ages spectacularly well
2. We play World of Warcraft together
3. You let me have your 70 warrior
4. Having ‘stuff’ isn’t important
5. You let me rant, but don’t encourage me
6. You can get ready and walk out the door in less than 5 minutes
7. You buy medicine when I’m sick or have allergies
8. You cry at commercials
9. Starbucks Mocha Frappuchinos make you giggle
10. You’re going to be a great mommy
11. You’re the only person I don’t feel self-conscious around
12. You drive so I can sleep in the car
13. That one night in Bangkok, with the three Thai massage girls and the ping pong balls…

D.O.Ebonics

2008-08-01T01:10:00.000-07:00

Awry is pronounced ah – rai NOT ow – rhee or ar - rhee

Component is not a synonym for proponent.

Dah…Dah…DahDahDahDah is not a replacement for an actual logical explanation (if you have a hard time imagining the last one, join the Leadership Team).

And seriously folks…Is eSIS really THAT difficult? Is it really THAT unstable? Are you telling me that in Phase 3 of the roll-out, these things haven’t been figured out by the hundreds of schools already using it? I find that really hard to believe even for the DOE. Therefore, it must be US.

And while I’m on the subject, anyone notice the SUPER long ‘I’m waiting for you guys to be quiet’ pause Big Dwayne pulled on the Math Department during training on Monday? Missed that? Did you miss the condescending stare he threw at them too? I couldn't have been the only one hoping Mark would whip out his lightsaber and pull a Yoda on the The Dark Lord of the Back Door Internet, could I?

Bow-chicka-wow-what is that leaking!?!

2008-08-01T01:05:00.000-07:00

Ok, this blog thing is harder than I thought.

Between all eating and the oofing, I don’t know how Deena and Jay manage to write so consistently.

So let me sum up my last few weeks or so for you:

-moving when your wife is 8 months pregnant is poor planning unless you’re Pat and can lift a sofa with one arm
-Craigslist is the BEST THING EVER!!!
-Internet > Cable
-Nothing feels quite like sleeping in your own house
-Until you discover that your 2nd floor tub is leaking through your 1st floor ceiling…

So that’s where are now. The Tsuhas use the tub ONCE (we weren’t even fooling around) and we freaking break it.

Is it possible? Sure. Is it probable? I don’t think so, especially when the plumber points out the patched ceiling drywall and the gaping holes in the floorboards that obviously aren’t part of the original plan.

So I have two choices, get nuts and go to court or just say f@ck it, fix the damn thing and move on. I’m choosing the latter. If the previous owners say knew nothing (which is possible since they were there less than two years) then they’re the ones who have to live with the honesty in whatever they’re saying. I’m not going to waste my time tilting on should’ve beens.

Still, for $3700 that new shower better hold up to whatever me and Stacie decide to do in it.

Experts Say Men Think of Sex Every Five Minutes

2008-07-01T19:44:00.000-07:00

Random thoughts as I drive to work…

Noe Tanigawa has the sexiest voice on radio (Hawaii Public Radio).

Baby names: Allison, Sarah, Vivian, Kimberly, Taylor, Ashley, Jodie, Elisan, Jaclyn, Katie, Morgan, Sasha, Alurielle, Meagan, Kylie, Shae, Kelsey, Haley, Riley, Reiko, Norkio, and Teeta Kapualani’oiwimakakoamonkeypodmanapuachoisumwonbok.

How much money do I save by getting lunch at Wendy's vs. McDonald's after factoring in the additional mile of driving?

Will I really care if my coffee table matches my couch once the baby arrives and I’m up to my elbows in barf and poop?

If the world descends into utter anarchy due to global warming, terrorism, and general human stupidity, my daily frugality is a complete waste of effort.

I wonder if I can work at the cafeteria and get free lunch every day?

I need to take ‘My Humps’ off as Stacie’s ringer.

Noriko sounds too FOB. Take that one off the list.

MTV Cribs - The Waipio Episode

2008-06-30T20:30:00.000-07:00

This one goes out to all my shorties and thugs in my new hood in Waipio. Excuse me if I don’t know how to write a script properly. Never took that class in college.

Flava Flav: ‘Yo, yo, yo, yo! Welcome to another episode of MTV Cribs with your new host…FLAAAAAAVA FLAAAAAAV! Yeeeeeeeah Boiiiiiiiiiz!

So, yo dogs. We are in Mr. Blake’dey Blake’s new townhouse. Brotha, how much you lay down for this $hit?

Blake: Three-hundred and ninety-thousand dollars.

Flava: WHAT!?! Lemme channel some Samuel Jackson. MUTHA-F^@#*A that is a lot of cash!
Blake: Yes it is.

Flava: No, seriously. That is a [spit flying everywhere] MUTHA-F^A#*ing lot of bills! Let’s take the tour. This place must be DOOOOOPE!

[Flava walks in to living room.]

Yo! Where’s the stage? Where’s the stripper pole?

Blake: …

Flava: [yelling from uptsairs] WHAT? NO JACUZZI? NO MIRRORS ABOVE THE BED? WHAT IS WRONG WITH YOU PEOPLE? Y’ALL AMISH OR SOMETHING?

[Flava comes down to ground floor.]

Yo, man. I hate to urinate on your parade, but I think you got ripped, yo. You got no stripper pole, no disco ball, no hot tub, and your damn bed don’t even vibrate. Hell! Even Deena and Jay got that sexy ass glass picture!

Blake: …

Flava: Forget it, dog. I’m outta here. I got my show to shoot and bitches to oof. Yo, does that RHYME OR WHAT?

Blake: Well, actually…

Flava: Shut up, Mr. Serious. I’m Flaaaaaaaava Flaaaaav and I do what I like!

Join us next week when we’ll check out a real playa’s hidey-home on MTV Cribs, Vice-Principal, Pat Anbe, whose muscles are so huge, he had to buy TWO 48-inch flat-screens just to watch home videos. YEAAAAAAAHHHH BOIIIIIIIIIIIIZ!

[End]

Anyway…We got our keys today. It’s not huge, doesn’t have a yard or a garage (and you know how I just love yard work and polishing my car), but it’s ours.

And I like the sound of that.

To Blog or Not to Blog...

2008-06-27T21:48:00.000-07:00

Blog: I miss the mental exercise of writing and I no longer have the discipline to write fiction.

Not to Blog: Get over yourself, you were never that good. Want to write? Keep a journal. Putting it on the internet is literary masturbation.

Blog: Sometimes you see something funny or interesting and would like to share it with your friends / family. Besides you can write about poker and stop boring Stacie with your bad beat sob-stories.

Not to Blog: Call them. Have a real conversation. By the way, Stacie said they're not bad beats. You just suck.

Blog: This will provide an opportunity to vent and maybe I’ll learn something from someone.

Not to Blog: Sure, because people blog to get other people’s opinions…

Blog: Maybe people will actually find what I write interesting.

Not to Blog: You’re not as funny as Jay, as real as Deena, or as spiritual as Leish. Alex is Mr. Sensitive, and Greg is Mr. Natural. C’mon, no one wants to read what a cynical, sarcastic, judgmental nerd who can’t dribble with his right hand thinks.

Blog: Sure, but you’re going through a lot of changes right now. Writing stuff down will be good for you. Reflecting is important, and forcing yourself to write for an audience will make you a better husband, father, and person.

Not to Blog: Damn…I hate it when you’re right.